So you're getting back into an active sexual life with new partner(s). Maybe you've split up from a longtime partner or maybe you're newly non-monogamous after an extended period with a single sexual partner. How can you jump on that train to bone town in the most risk-aware way?
It can be scary to get back out there when you hear so much information about how important it is to maintain your sexual health but aren't necessarily getting the specific details you need. What follows is a basic breakdown that will hopefully leave you feeling armed with the information you need to make the best choices for you and empowered to advocate for your sexual health.
Let's talk STIs.
Not all Doctors are built the same when it comes to STI testing. Even if you have a good relationship with your MD there's a good chance you'll need to advocate for yourself since they won't always want to cooperate with giving you the tests you require. Cost and availability will also vary greatly with your location in the world.
STIs to test for
Blood/fluid borne: Tested with blood tests
HIV
Syphilis
Hepatitis B and/or C (Can get vaccine against B)
Fluid borne: Tested with swabs or urine tests
Chlamydia
Gonorrhea - each area (vag/penis, anus, throat) must be swabbed separately. Not all MDs willing to swab for oral or anal gonorrhea but it is worth doing if changing partners regularly.
Trichomoniasis
Skin to skin:
HPV - In British Columbia (where we live) it's not tested for except for through pap test for the cancerous strains. It's assumed everyone has it or has been exposed to it and cleared the infection without symptoms or treatment.
150 strains HPV
40 strains affect genitals
2 strains cause 90% genital warts
12 high risk cancer causing strains (most cancers come from 2 strains)
The HPV vaccine is indicated to age 45. Worth getting if newly active in sexual arena.
Herpes/HSV - 2 types.
Type I typically cold sores.
Type II typically on genitals.
Can get either strain on either area.
Someone with a Type I cold sore can give you Type I on your genitals.
Giving oral to someone with Type II genital herpes can give you Type II on your face.
Basic blood test doesn't indicate strain. Will need to do separate test (and often pay more) to determine strain. Often is not definitive.
Online testing is becoming more of a thing for people who don't want to go to an MD and deal with the potential shaming. There are a number of companies offering to send you kits in the mail that you either do at home and mail back or go to a lab for the specific tests. You usually get your results online as well. (Including them below is no guarantee of their quality. Do your due diligence.)
Get Checked Online - in lower mainland BC - is free with your Care Card. Limited tests available.
STDCheck.com - in US
Let'sGetChecked.com - in Canada
Why STI and not STD? Not all things transmitted sexually are diseases so infections is more accurate.
Someone told me they have an STI, what do I do? There's no need to panic. For the most part, people who test regularly and are aware of their STI status are generally more responsible than those who have no idea. And despite the fear mongering in the media, most STIs are treatable and even the lifelong ones are more of a nuisance than anything else. The stigma surrounding STIs is often the worst part. If you still want to sleep with a person who has an STI you can choose to use extra barriers with that person, though no guarantee of 'safety'. You can also choose not to sleep with that person but don't be an asshole about it.
Why not 'clean'? People with STIs are not dirty so you should never describe yourself as clean when you've tested negative to STIs. Negative is a better descriptor and won't make people around you feel judged and shamed.
